Fake Vacation
September 9th, 2022
Written by: Jay Looch
First full work week of September is in the books. It feels like Summer somehow ended months ago. Vibes are completely different and the weather took a 180 with a B-line to the north pole. I am already looking at flights to Florida to sit poolside like Summer never left. But hey, at least I have my company's national conference next month. Nothing like a fake ass vacation we all know as a business trip.
My office sits in NYC. I deal with different bull-shit every day. And every single day I tell myself I need a vacation. It's tough to plan a trip late in the year with Q3 winding down and crunch time for the office as a whole to hit their goals. But one can say that they have a vacation coming up. A good ole business trip. Business trips are such a tease. Usually only there for 2 to 3 days, and they fill every time gap known to man. From the 7:30 AM breakfasts, all the way to the “team building activities” after the 12 hour meetings. Hell, they even have bathroom breaks on schedule.
It is more like camp as a kid. They keep you busy so you don’t go out and actually do shit you want to. They choose absolutely beautiful locations too. Places where you would actually go on vacation. They do this so you can stare out the window at palm trees which makes listening to your CEO talk about the success story of Suzy from the Ohio office that much better. Don’t worry, you’ll get your freedom at the end. The last day they always decide to “let you out early”. Which really just means to get your ass to the airport and get home to be in the office tomorrow morning. Now you have to go and talk with your office about what you learned at the conferences. You find yourself thinking that the only thing you really learned is that, “I need a vacation”.
In reality business trips are nice. Change of scenery and you don’t have to do legit work for a few days. You sit there and act like you give a shit and throw on a fake ass smile. I mean that's what we do anyway in the corporate world.